2796) I’ve been on tumblr and talking to other trans* girls for so long, some of them have become amazingly gorgeous and I haven’t had the circumstances to start HRT yet. It just makes me want to cry. I just want to be beautiful too.
2795) I don’t know a single trans person who’s further along in transition than I am, but I’m only a year “post transition.” I have friends who look up to me as an example of someone who’s “made it,” but I still feel adrift and scared when I think about the future. I don’t have any role models or peers, and I fear it would be compromising myself to look for them.
2794) I can barely bring myself to look at a mirror. Every time I do I see a glimpse of who I should be, before everything else floods in. Right now there’s absolutely nothing I can do to fix it.
2793) I just realized just how many of us only truly live at night, when we don’t have the prying eyes of society to keep us locked in our own bodies, when we can finally relax and be ourselves without worry of ridicule and fear of bigotry, i simultaneously realized just how much i want to see the sun.
2792) Just once, I’d like someone who knows I’m trans to tell me that I look pretty, rather than say that I pass well.
2791) Sometimes when I’m in the shower, I think that if I just scrub hard enough.. my body with fall away and underneath all of it will be an awesome female body. It never works.
2790) Why is it that after 2 months of HRT do I feel like maybe this is a mistake? Like I’d be happier as a guy? It almost feels like I’m forcing myself to take the pills every morning against my will. Something doesn’t make sense and more confused than ever. I can’t tell if I’m in a rut once again or maybe I need to stop.
2789) I will sometimes stand in the bathroom shaving my face till the battery of my electric shaver dies. Then I will cry because I am still not satisfied with the face in the mirror.
2788) I hate that cisguys will tell me I’m attractive, but the minute I tell them I’m trans, they take it back.
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